The following student report was submitted by Ambassador League Agent Joshua E. during the 2007-2008 League.
Ambassador League Biblical Study: Sanctity of Marriage
Sanctity is defined as the condition of being considered sacred and holy, which is to be set apart. The Sanctity of Marriage is a key principle of Christian living because of both its centrality to family dynamics as well as its parallels to Biblical subject matter.
The importance of marriage in the Bible can be inferred from its being discussed in some detail. In fact, the major theme of the Bible is the metaphor of God's marriage to us. The Israelites and the New Testament Church represent the bride, while Christ represents the bridegroom. Paul wrote to the Corinthians: "For I am jealous for you with the jealousy of God himself. I promised you as a pure bride to one husband-Christ." (2 Corinthians 11:2) Isaiah wrote to the Israelites: "Never again will you be called 'The Forsaken City' or 'The Desolate Land.' Your new name will be 'The City of God's Delight' and 'The Bride of God,' for the Lord delights in you and will claim you as his bride." (Isaiah 62:4)
God's faithfulness to us should be our example for fidelity within marriage. When the Israelites were unfaithful, God said: "You say, 'That's not true! I haven't worshiped the images of Baal!' But how can you say that? Go and look in any valley in the land! Face the awful sins you have done. You are like a restless female camel desperately searching for a mate." (Jeremiah 2:23-24) However, God's faithfulness is not conditional like ours can be. Jeremiah later wrote: "God's Message came to me as follows: 'If a man's wife walks out on him and marries another man, can he take her back as if nothing had happened? Wouldn't that raise a huge stink in the land? And isn't that what you've done- 'whored' your way with god after god? And now you want to come back as if nothing had happened.' God's Decree. 'Go, proclaim this message toward the north: 'Return, faithless Israel,' declares the Lord, 'I will frown on you no longer, for I am merciful,' declares the Lord, 'I will not be angry forever. 'Return, faithless people,' declares the Lord, 'for I am your husband.'" (Jeremiah 3:1, 12, 14a)
It is clear from these passages and others that the sanctity of marriage is dear to God's heart. It is dear to my family since we recognize that our family cannot hold together without this dimension of holiness within marriage. Unfortunately, our society has lost its vision for this spiritual dimension and has in many cases reduced marriage to the level of a legal contract. This is demonstrated by 50% of marriages ending in divorce. When questioned about the righteousness of divorce, Jesus said: "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery." (Matthew 19:8) It is that sacred - when you marry, you are in it for the long haul. A revival of sanctity in marriage is needed now more than ever.
What is it that makes marriage so special? It is interesting that our primary text comes from a couple that was never "officially" married. It began with the first problem in the Bible. "The Lord God said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.' Now the Lord God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found." (Genesis 2:18-20) The first thing in history that God declared "not good" was Adam's loneliness. Thus, the original purpose of marriage was a cure for loneliness; it was an institution to provide a lifelong friend.
The story continues: "So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. The man said, 'This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man.'" (Genesis 2:21-23) God could have made Eve out of dust, but He decided to create her from man. The word "rib" found in most English translations is derived from the Hebrew word "tsela", which was more commonly translated as "side", implying half. We need to pay attention to the symbolism this represents: husband and wife were created to be intimately connected beings and find completion in their other "tsela". Paul did not believe that marriage was absolutely necessary, as seen in his frank discussion found in 1 Corinthians 7, but it is a better option than burning with lust.
The passage concludes: "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh." (Genesis 2:24) This verse is key in understanding the nature of marriage. Marriage is not a friendship like other friendships, nor is it a marriage of families. Loyalty shifts to the new family formed by the marriage. It is the establishing of a relationship that is second to none but a relationship with Christ.
The importance of this relationship and its requirement of complete faithfulness are repeated throughout the Bible. Paul wrote: "Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral." (Hebrews 13:4) The book of Proverbs gives a strong admonition against the lure of the adulteress: "Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes, for the prostitute reduces you to a loaf of bread, and the adulteress preys upon your very life. Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned? Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched? So is he who sleeps with another man's wife; no one who touches her will go unpunished." (Proverbs 6:25-29) We play with fire when we disregard the sanctity of marriage. Gay marriage is relevant here, but I will save that discussion for my Bible study on homosexuality.
We are told in the book of Ephesians how to conduct ourselves within marital relationships. To the women: "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything." (Ephesians 5:22-24) This is not about sexism. Genesis says that both men and women were created in the image of God, and Jesus treated women with great respect. Yet as the Romans appointed a dictator in times of trouble for the sake of unity of action, so God has appointed men as the decision-makers within marriage. Another factor that played into Paul's treatment of women in his writings was that women were considered culturally inferior to men. By telling women to act in submission, Paul was telling them to act on the modest side of cultural tradition.
Paul wrote to the men: "Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself." (Ephesians 5:25-28) The role of men is not to lord it over their wives. They are told to love and spur their wives on to purity in their relationship with Christ.
We read in 1 Peter 3:7: "The same goes for you husbands: Be good husbands to your wives. Honor them, delight in them. As women they lack some of your advantages. But in the new life of God's grace, you're equals. Treat your wives, then, as equals so your prayers don't run aground." Even with the responsibility of being the head in the marriage, husbands are still to treat their wives as equal. Respect and love is the key. Men are also commanded to cherish their wives. This is love on a much deeper level. It is pouring your heart and soul into your wife and assuring her of your love and devotion. It is a heart attitude that husbands should strive to attain in obedience to that which God calls them to be.
